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When the news broke that Cyprus would be seizing assets from bank accounts to bail itself out, most Americans immediately asked two question: What the hell is Cyprus? Is it a brand of dish washing detergent?

Meanwhile the minority of Americans with a basic concept of geography asked two quite different questions: if a European nation can get away with literally stealing its citizens life savings right out of their freaking bank accounts, what sort of precedent does that set? Could it happen here?

Well, could WHAT happen here, exactly? Could OUR government appropriate funds directly from our wallets by force, in order to fund its massive Socialist entitlement empire? Could OUR government, without our willful participation, take whatever amount of money it wants from us? Could OUR government open up a direct line to our livelihood and extract from it at will? Could OUR government systematically seize our assets to cover the losses created by its own reckless mismanagement?

No, no. That could never happen here. I mean, except for literally every single week when they take money directly out of your paycheck. Except for that, you know. And except for the fact that the only difference between us and Cyprus is that here the government takes your money before you put it in the bank, and there they wait until after you deposit it.

But, yeah, we’re good. There’s nothing to worry about. We’re the land of the free. Now let’s all go back to sleep. Gotta rest up. We’ve got a lot of TV to watch tonight.