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Some of the people roughly on my side of the ideological fence tend to disagree pretty harshly with me on this point. But it’s almost Thanksgiving, so it’s time for me to once again explain why people who shop Black Friday deals on Thanksgiving are heinous barbarians. I’ve upped the ante this year and decided that all of them will be deported. I’m not sure how or where, but I’ll find a way. Mark my words.

In all seriousness, I think the ongoing encroachment of Black Friday onto Thanksgiving’s turf brings up a very important conversation about the differences between consumerism and capitalism. In this country, we are solidly the former and barely the latter. In fact, the former often comes at the expense of the latter. See: stimulus plans, bailouts, and EBT cards as an example.

But then we can go deeper still, and talk about the value of tradition and family, and whether our obsession with consuming products and merchandise has made it harder for us to appreciate both of those things. So I don’t know if you’ll follow me on this one or not, but I feel very strongly about it. We should be able to cool it for one day — just one day — and enjoy something that isn’t sold on a rack at Target.

One other note, lest I be accused of plagiarizing myself. This is a reworked version of something I posted last year, and the year before that, and even the year before that, even though I didn’t have a blog then. Every year I will go on this tirade until there aren’t any stores in America selling jeans or iPads on Thanksgiving. It’s the least I can do. Literally, the least I can do. But at least it’s something:

Click here to read.