In the old days they didn’t have anything called “dating”, instead they had “courtship.” And courting would have looked a lot like dating, with one difference: There was a point. They had a purpose. They had a goal. They were interested in being adults and making a commitment, and the courting process would tell them whether they should or could make that commitment to each other. Marriage was the ultimate destination, and if it became apparent that this destination could not be reached, they ended the courtship and moved on with their lives. The modern dating strategy is different. You don’t have one common goal or desired destination. Instead, you spin in circles together until someone gets dizzy and jumps off. The sudden stop sends the other person hurtling into space, while you wander aimlessly away, searching desperately for another random stranger to recklessly repeat the dance with.

I’m not judging. I did this for many misguided years before I met my wife. Obviously when I met her she wasn’t yet my wife, but she was already a grown emotionally mature woman who wasn’t simply looking for some dude to hang out with for the next three or four years. She was looking for a relationship that could move forward, not a relationship that could tread water until we both become too emotionally exhausted to continue. I picked up on this within minutes. Six months later I asked her to marry me. We never dated, it was a courtship from the beginning, even if we didn’t call it that.

So I’m merely reaching out to younger people, and I’m trying to tell you that this pointless, confusing, heartbreaking, soul eating, nihilistic dating game we play nowadays is a chaotic disaster and you’ll gain nothing from it. If you’re currently in a relationship with someone and you know that it will never actually progress into anything — end it. End it right now. Seriously, call your poor girlfriend or boyfriend on the phone and tell them it’s over. You both know your eventual demise is inevitable, why waste any more time lying to each other? And that’s what our new dating philosophy is: A lie. You lie to yourself and you lie to them until you can’t maintain the mutual delusion any longer.

Let me assure you, the dating scene doesn’t teach you any skills that will help you build a successful marriage in the future. Pointless, directionless dating doesn’t teach you how to be IN mature relationships, it teaches you how to get OUT of them. Dating — the sort of dating I’m talking about — is dress rehearsal for divorce, not marriage. I don’t know how any rational person could claim that having a string of failed, shallow relationships could somehow prepare you for a serious and permanent union. No, failed relationships prepare you to deal with failed relationships. That’s it. Trust me, once you’ve actually made that final commitment to someone, once you’ve conceived children with them, once you’ve loved them so deeply that you’d literally die for them without hesitation, you’ll see that your entire dating history was a frivolous, embarrassing waste of time. At best. At worst it was a tragedy, and now everything you have to give your spouse is worn, rusted and secondhand. Really, isn’t it sad that so many of us will say “I love you” to a dozen people before we finally say it to the only person who really deserves to hear it?

I see folks on Facebook all the time throwing pity parties for themselves, posting things like: “I’ve learned I can’t trust anyone and I should never get too close!” It’s pathetic, but it reveals a truth. This is what modern dating teaches people. It trains you to remain closed off, to avoid commitment, to be guarded and suspicious, to never make too many plans for the future, to be fake and fraudulent. The dating scene requires this disposition. You can’t parade around with trust and vulnerability when you’re doing the purposeless dating routine. You’ll be ripped to shreds. But this necessarily cynical disposition will surely doom a marriage. That’s a problem. What makes you good at dating is precisely what will make you horrible at marriage. That’s what happens when you go through one relationship after another where both parties make a full emotional investment but never any actual meaningful commitment. You’re only buying yourself heartache and betrayal, even if you’re putting it on layaway. See, you can only be thrown into an emotional wood chipper so many times before you suffer some lasting psychological damage. And then one day you’ll take those wounds down the aisle, and your spouse will have to pick up the pieces.

So the point is, do all things with a purpose. And that especially includes dating. I know you won’t listen to any of this. I know I didn’t. But it’s the truth, and one day you’ll see that.

Really try to comprehend the infuriating irony here. It’s already hilarious that anyone at the IRS would invoke any of the amendments, considering they toil tirelessly to eviscerate every single one of them, every single day. Their job is to come to work and violate your constitutional liberties. That’s literally what they do for a living. An IRS official pleading for us to respect their constitutional rights is like a criminal abortion doctor pleading for us to spare his life. Coincidentally, both situations have happened in the last couple of weeks. Societally speaking, we are essentially becoming one big oxymoron.

Only it’s worse with this lady. Not only did she hide behind the very constitution she has ripped to shreds throughout her career, but her lawyer actually tried to get her out of appearing before the committee by claiming that it would be, and I quote, “a burden” and too “embarrassing” for her. The woman who sent her minions out to conduct retaliatory audits of political groups she opposed, now wants us to feel bad about “embarrassing” or “burdening” her. I repeat: Someone who works for the FREAKING IRS doesn’t want to be “burdened.” You ever had someone threatened to take your house away and lock you in prison if you don’t pay an exorbitant sum of money, Lois? I’d call that, perhaps, a bit of a burden. And that’s what you people do every day. What about forcing a religious group to explain what they pray about, as a precondition for tax exempt status? I’d say that’s slightly “embarrassing”, wouldn’t you?

Embarrassing. If I had my way I’d show her embarrassing. If I was in charge I’d have these thugs put in some good old fashioned medieval stockades for a few days, a little public shaming could go a long way. And then I’d throw them in prison. These people are criminals. I say we clear every drug addict and petty thief out of prison to make room for these IRS bullies. Think of the beauty of it. It brings tears to my eyes just dreaming about dressing these IRS goons in orange jumpsuits and giving them a nice public perp walk into jail. Then, after those responsible for the persecution have been prosecuted and imprisoned, and after everyone else is fired and the IRS is abolished, we can demolish the buildings where they once worked so diligently to harass and burglarize honest Americans. Or we could burn the buildings, and then dance around the ashes, singing and dancing into the night. Ahhh. What a gorgeous sight it would be.

And if we were a free and righteous people, that’s what we’d do.

Instead, we’ll just have a few more Congressional hearings until everyone gets bored and forgets that any of this ever happened. That’ll show ‘em.

Here are some facts for you, not that these types of people really care much for facts. Prior to this tornado we were setting records in this country for a LACK of tornadic activity. Is that global warming also? So if there are no tornadoes, it’s global warming. If there are lots of tornadoes, it’s global warming. If there are small tornadoes, it’s global warming. If there are big tornadoes, it’s global warming. Is that the way it works? Essentially, anything that happens is because of global warming because global warming causes everything that happens? Why don’t you clowns look up “circular logic” in the dictionary? Actually, first look up “tornado” in the dictionary, because you obviously have zero understanding of this particular weather phenomenon.

Tornadoes aren’t caused by tropical heat. In fact, tropical climates hardly ever see tornadoes. Why is that? Because tornadoes need something called “wind shear.” I’m not a meteorologist but even I know this. These wind shears develop when warm and cool air collide. Other factors must be present, like low level humidity, but it’s the contrasting cool and warm air that is essential to bringing about tornadoes. So what does this mean? It means unusually and unseasonably cool air in the Midwest is the key to tornado formation. That’s probably why they pointed to global COOLING when the country was plagued with an outbreak of tornadoes in 1974-1975.

Plus, you know, it’s OKLAHOMA. Are we really struggling to explain a tornado in Oklahoma? Not surprising, I suppose, as these are the same folks who scramble to solve the “mystery” every time a hurricane pounds the Gulf Coast. See, global warming alarmists, this is why nobody listens to you. You don’t know anything. You’re blatantly and embarrassingly uninformed. You shout “SCIENCE!” and then you summarily display a startling absence of even the most basic scientific understanding of the most basic climatological events. Not to mention, you never hesitate to stand on the fresh rubble of shattered lives to preach your mythological orthodoxy. Dumb AND evil. That’s a hell of a combo.

I pray for the people whose lives have been shattered by this storm. And I also pray for us, that we don’t allow ourselves to be numbed by the seemingly constant barrage of death and destruction in the news. We really are blessed to have this life, as fragile and painful as it may be. But it can be taken from us at any moment, and eventually it will be, one way or another. That doesn’t mean we should live in fear, or become disconnected and jaded — it means we should try to fill our days with as much love and joy as possible. I think you can build it up inside you, like a reservoir, and feed on it when your days turn dark.

I pray that God will comfort the people in Oklahoma tonight. They need all our love and support now.

However, as expected, this consensus only lasted for about 20 seconds. Now the left wingers have gone back to their Statist fortress, manned the battle stations, and are beginning to come up with arguments to explain why the persecution by the IRS was warranted. Now, I’m of the opinion that you are a slimy traitor (no offense) if you side with the IRS against your fellow Americans for any reason. But the particular reason I’m hearing in this case is especially disgusting: They say that Tea Party groups should be scrutinized because they don’t “deserve” tax exempt status in the first place. Politicians like Cruella De Ville, I mean Nancy Pelosi, have said that we need to reexamine the parameters and qualifications for 501 (c) 3 organizations. Essentially, they assert, the IRS only erred in not targeting MORE groups.

I have a couple of issues with this argument. First of all, what the hell is wrong with us that we’ve allowed the phrase “tax exempt” to even come about in the first place? The implication is that the IRS has a God given right to take everyone’s money, and if you don’t want your money taken you have to plead for an “exemption.” So the default status of all people, organizations, groups, societies, and clubs, is that they are taxed. Our natural state is to be taxed and controlled. If you exist, you owe the IRS. If you don’t pay up, you’re either a crook or you’ve been granted a merciful exemption from the gods of the Internal Revenue Service. What a shameful citizenry we have become. This is pathetic. I ask again: What is wrong with us? Everyone should be exempt from the IRS because the IRS shouldn’t exist. But instead of calling for the destruction of the IRS, we fall at their knees and beg them to tax our neighbor more than they tax us. Gross. Treasonous. Anti-American.

Second, so you don’t think the Tea Party should qualify as a 501 (c) 3? Ok, well what about Planned Parenthood? Planned Parenthood is a billion dollar corporation that rakes in millions in PURE PROFIT and they somehow qualify as a “non profit.” They offer an expensive service called abortion, which they charge money for, and which they make hundreds of millions of dollars performing. Yet they’re a tax exempt “non profit” group. They also engage in heavy political advocacy and contribute millions to liberal politicians. They are a billion dollar, hugely profitable, politically active business which makes hundreds of millions of dollars offering a very pricey service, yet they’re a 501 (c) 3? Where’s the scrutiny there? Actually, it’s even worse. They aren’t just “exempt” from taxes, they also RECEIVE millions of dollars from the tax payers. You have a problem with the Tea Party being exempt from taxes, meanwhile Planned Parenthood gets 500 million dollars a year from Obama and you say nothing? Hypocrites. Frauds. Fools. You people would have aneurysms if a Republican president handed half a billion dollars to Tea Party groups, yet you clap like seals while our government shovels barrels of cash into the offices of a corporation that makes hundreds of millions of dollars killing children.

I’m fine with Planned Parenthood being “exempt” from the IRS, because I don’t think the IRS should exist. I actually have these things called “principles” that I apply equally. That said, it’s a crime of astronomical proportions that these monsters actually get WELFARE from the State. Don’t cry about the Tea Party not paying tax money, until you’ve screamed about Planned Parenthood receiving tax money.

Or, if you’re not a selfish hoarding materialist, you could do immeasurable good. You could save lives, transform entire towns, help countless people. You could do a lot for posterity, like invent time travel. Seriously, with 500 million I bet you could build a time machine. Maybe not you, personally, but you could pay the ten smartest people in the world 10 million dollars each to invent a time machine. Maybe rent out a conference room at the Hilton, have it catered by Quiznos, and tell them not to come out until they’ve discovered the key to time travel. You could even pay armed guards to stand by the exit and execute anyone who tries to leave before innovating an effective method to traverse the space time continuum. Like I said, you could do a lot of good.

Or, if you’re the American government, you could waste the entire amount on nothing in less than 90 minutes. I want you to really contemplate this. Our government spends the equivalent of a record breaking Powerball jackpot every hour and a half. In the time it would take you to drive to the lottery office and cash in your ticket, our politicians will have spent well over the full amount of your winnings. It’s the sort of money that could change the world, and these reckless fools blow it in less time than it takes to watch three episodes of Everybody Loves Raymond. These incompetent thieves essentially spend Bill Gates’ entire net worth in a week. Every week. Take any great empire in the history of civilization, and our government could bankrupt it in a few days. It should be impossible do what they do. It’s like if you dropped someone in the middle of the ocean with nothing but a drinking straw, and when you came back 14 hours later they’re sitting in a huge, dry ditch. And they REALLY need to pee. Our government is so horrible that they manage to screw things up in mathematically anomalous ways. Plain and simple, you are a raging lunatic if you think a government NEEDS to appropriate TRILLIONS from its citizens and still rack up 40 thousand dollars of debt EVERY SECOND. They take more money from us than a thousand crackheads could spend in a thousand years, yet they still “need” to borrow trillions more.

Our government is a black hole. It consumes and destroys. That’s all it does. In fact, actual black holes are looking at our government and going “What the hell?!” It’s not funny. We officially have the worst management in the history of the known universe. And now watch most of these idiotic crooks get reelected.

I always laugh at the shower soap that advertises that it’s a “body AND face wash.” Isn’t your face already a part of your body? If it’s for my body can’t I already assume it would work on my face? Even better: The soap that claims to be special because it’s “anti-bacterial.” ISN’T ALL SOAP ANTI-BACTERIAL? Isn’t that the freaking POINT of soap? Is there a pro-bacterial soap out there that I’m not aware of?

Hey, here’s an idea: Do you think we could maybe use ONE type of soap to handle all of these tasks? Can’t there just be a soap that cleans dirty things? Does the chemical formulation of the soap really differ all that drastically depending on what sort of dirty thing it is “specially designed” to clean? Is it really reasonable for your daily routine to require 47 different types of soap? How fundamentally different are these soaps?

I think we’re really losing our minds. We’re all becoming a bunch of pampered consumerist divas. Can you imagine what your great grandfather would think if he walked into your house and saw how many types of soap you have? In his day, they bathed once a month using cold water and baking soda AND THEY LIKED IT, DAMN IT. Seriously, companies can sell the same thing in 12 different packages and we’ll buy all 12. More and more marketing departments are catching onto this, and we fall for it every time. Have you ever noticed how many “different” types of water they sell now? WATER. It’s freaking WATER. You know what the difference is between the special “enhanced” sports water you bring to the gym, and the normal water I drink from the fountain at the gym? I drank mine for free. That’s it. That’s the only difference. Mine isn’t tainted with the taste of wasted money, yours is. I’m just waiting for them to start selling special “anti-dry” water for cleaning. People would buy it, too.

And, yes, I just did four paragraphs on soap and water. I could go on for another 19 pages if you like.

“…People make Christianity more complicated than it needs to be. We just have to be nice to people, that’s it. Be nice to your neighbor and everything will be fine. That was Jesus’ whole point.”

No. Wrong. Horribly, horribly wrong. I wouldn’t even be addressing this if it weren’t for the fact that so many people nowadays have this impression. They believe, or want to believe, that God sent His only Son to suffer and die, all so that he could spread a message that an episode of Barney can effectively get across in 22 minutes. Sure, it’s nice to be nice to people. But is that the entire point of the universe? The Ultimate Truth is “niceness”, that’s it? Synonyms: Amiable, peachy, swell. That’s why Christ came? To tell us to be amiable?

Being nice is fine. Serial killers can be nice to people. In fact, they generally are very nice, except for when they’re murdering. But that means they’re nice to like 97 or 98 percent of everyone they meet. I guess that means they’re following Christ almost all of the time, right? How often do we hear the interviews with the classmates and the neighbors after a mass killer goes on a murder spree, and they talk about how “nice” he was? They never say he was wise, loving, just, righteous, moral, or courageous — they just say he was “nice.” Apparently, it would seem, you can be nice and also evil. You can’t be evil and loving. You can’t be evil and moral. You can’t be evil and righteous. But you can be evil and nice. If you ask me where is the best place to buy some heroin, I could smile and point you down the dark alley across the street. I could even tell you to have a great afternoon as you walk away. That would be very pleasant, very nice. And then you’ll overdose and die alone behind a dumpster, but, hey, at least I was nice when I sent you there.

You know, maybe nice isn’t the entire point of existence after all. If you had to sum up Christ’s message in one word, it wouldn’t be “nice”, and it wouldn’t be “friendly”, and it wouldn’t be “polite.” It would be “love.” Love. That’s the point. Jesus didn’t just preach love, He showed it. He demonstrated it. He died in pain, bleeding on a cross. There was nothing nice about it. But it was the greatest act of love in the history of the universe. Love isn’t always nice, but it is always sacrificial. It doesn’t possess or take or steal, it only gives. Love is not love if it isn’t true, moral, right, just and courageous. Love isn’t love if it doesn’t come from God. Nowadays we think we “love” someone if they make us feel good about ourselves. We think we love them if we just let them do whatever they want to do. We’ve perverted love into selfishness and reduced it to mere amiability.

Love is the point. And the Bible shows us WHAT love is, WHERE it comes from, and HOW it acts.

I’m really getting sick of these child abusing quacks and their never ending quest to forcibly impose their ideas of normalcy on me and my family. In my life I’ve been blessed to know many people who are, without a doubt, intellectually adept, highly creative, and very gifted. Every single one of them either have been, or could be, diagnosed with any number of “mental disorders.” And that’s not a damn coincidence. Brilliant people think divergently, they have a different way of formulating and processing their thoughts and communicating those thoughts to the world. And whatever goes on in that beautiful head, what it eventually produces is almost always enlightening and exciting. Smart, creative people don’t fit into any sort of preordained mental “order.” They just don’t. It truly saddens me to think of all the geniuses we have drugged into submission by the age of 7. There is an idea out there that claims all children are born geniuses, until our society ruins their inherent mental power through rigid educational systems and dangerous psychotropic medication. I think there’s a lot of truth to this. The human mind is capable of incredible, miraculous things, if only we can unlock its potential. Instead, we do the exact opposite. We strap a straight jacket on it and throw it in a padded room, afraid of what it might do if we allow it to run free.

The only thing worse than trying to control WHAT people think, is trying to control HOW they think. In this country, we do both. And then we have the freaking nerve to claim we value “diversity” and “freedom.” We do EVERYTHING in our power to ERADICATE diversity of thought and freedom of thought, even resorting to fabricating mental disorder epidemics to give us an excuse to commit chemical genocides of entire personality types.

We can’t have it both ways. We either want children to fit into our reductive, simplistic, constraining mold so that they will sit still and follow the program, OR we want them, first and foremost, to be creative, smart, passionate, curious, and inquisitive. One must come at the expense of the other, there is no way around it. People who choose the former do so for their OWN convenience and benefit, and that is the real crime.

I hate what we do to children in this country. I hate how scared we are of different ideas and how incapable we are of appreciating the beauty and power of a creative, unrestrained mind. I hate it with a passion. But maybe that’s just because I have a mental disorder.

I’ve heard Obama supporters react with exasperation at the criticism. “Give the guy a break”, they insist. Well, look, I’d love to, but can the guy take a break from being an elitist snob? Seriously, can he take like 2 or 3 hours off? Can he be a normal human being for even a small period of time? You’re out there to answer questions about corruption, treachery and deception, and you decide it would be wise to do so while you use a Marine like your own personal butler? What’s next? Are you going to have Navy SEALS fly in to shine your shoes? Does an Army Ranger fluff your pillow for you every night? I mean, seriously dude, you can’t just hold your own damn umbrella? NOBODY in Obama’s circle stopped him before he went out there and said “Hey, Mr. President, there’s sort of this impression everyone has that you’re an aloof, petty, arrogant despot, so maybe now’s the exactly wrong time to publicly utilize a member of the armed forces as your servant.” Of course they didn’t say that. He surrounds himself with cowardly sycophants because he’s a thin skinned oligarch.

There is no amount of criticism that is inappropriate. He’s just horrible. There’s nothing to like. Really, I looked, I can’t find one single positive trait. He is the physical manifestation of everything that is wrong with American politics. So is it petty to go after the guy for forcing a Marine to hold his umbrella so he didn’t get moist during a press conference? Perhaps. But forcing a Marine to hold your umbrella so you don’t get most during a press conference is even pettier. Maybe if he’d just be a man for a change, we wouldn’t get to this point.