Last night I went to a showing of Les Miserables. And when I say “went to” I mean “hogtied and dragged at gun point by my wife, her sister and her mom”. By the looks of many of the other men in that crowded overheated theater, I was not the only hostage victim in attendance. In fact I saw one dude commit Hara-kiri while shouting “death before dishonor” in the parking lot prior to the screening. At first I thought he was slightly overreacting. And then the movie started.
I have to say, after watching the entire film, it was actually a thousand times worse than I could have imagined. Les Miserables will stand forever as the most miserable cinematic experience I’ve ever suffered through. And this is coming from a guy who saw “Christmas with the Kranks” in theaters, so that should tell you something.
Let me run through a few points about this excruciating horror show for anyone, especially any man, who has not yet been forced to endure it.
Les Miserables apparently holds the Guinness world record for longest musical about a minor parole violation. It tells the utterly pointless tale of an ex-con as he tries to elude a bumbling parole officer for 20 years. This is also, it should be mentioned, the first film to show two decades pass by in real time. So if you’re heading to the theater tonight make sure to pack a change of clothes. My wife told me afterward that the movie, despite its torturous running time, actually CUT OUT several scenes from the original play. Too bad they didn’t cut out more scenes. Like every scene. Of course it didn’t have to be that long. Hugh Jackman, the criminal guy, could have just, you know, MOVED OUT OF THE FREAKING CITY IF HE DIDN’T WANT TO BE CAUGHT. Instead this whole game of cat-and-mouse between Jackman and Russell Crowe takes place in one neighborhood. The dumbest criminal of the millennium vs. a law enforcement officer that makes every Leslie Nielsen character look like Sherlock Holmes in comparison.
Oh. But it gets worse. Much worse. They sing. Dear God do they sing. They sing EVERYTHING. Look, I know it’s a musical. I get it. I’ve seen Fiddler on the Roof and The Sound of Music and West Side Story. They sing in those films/plays also. But then they break up the musical numbers with normal dialogue. But that’s just too simple and not nearly irritating enough, according to the maniac who wrote this tornado of crap. Every single line in the movie is sung. It doesn’t matter how pedestrian the dialogue, they have to put it to music: “Pass the salt”, “Hang on I gotta take a leak”, etc. All put to song. My sister-in-law cried throughout the whole movie. I cried tears of blissful joy when Russell Crowe threw himself off a bridge at the end because it meant he’d finally stop singing. BUT EVEN THAT DIDN’T STOP HIM. All the dead people had to come back before the credits for one last encore. By the way, Crowe, you’re the guy who played the gladiator but now you will live in infamy as the most awkward casting decision in Hollywood history. You reminded me of someone’s dad who was tossed into the school play at the last minute after his son came down with laryngitis on opening night.
But let’s talk about the “big” musical numbers. You don’t need to buy the soundtrack. I’ll sum up every song in the movie. Here you go: “I’m so lonely, I’m so alone, look at me my life is hard, I’m alone, I’m on my own, there’s this empty chair here, it’s empty because I’m alone, I’m lonely, all this bad stuff has happened to me because of my inexcusably stupid life choices, I’m alone, I feel so alone, on my own, on my own, on my own, did I mention I’m on my oooooowwwwwn?”
Not a dry eye in the house after we heard that one. For the 40th time.
Vapid, shallow, predictable, self indulgent and emotionally manipulative. “BUT IT’S A CLASSIC!” No. No it’s not. Who cares if the play has been around for a while? Malaria has been around for a while. Just because something is old doesn’t make it a “classic”.
And I haven’t even mentioned the fact that half the characters in this flick– which is set in France — have an inexplicable limey British chimney sweep accent. That would make sense for Mary Poppins but not this. Incidentally THAT’S a musical I’d sooner watch 5 times in a row before being subjected to another 3 minutes of Les Miserables.
Then, two thirds of the way through the movie, we get the obligatory tragic love story. Here’s how it goes: a young French revolutionary spots a blonde chick across the street. The two lock eyes and literally THAT NIGHT the dumb desperate loser is singing about how he’d “die for her”. Really? And I’m supposed to become psychologically invested in a plot device that has just reduced the beauty, joy, pain and sacrifice of romantic love to something you can catch like a cold or fall into like a puddle? I know Hollywood has been peddling that nonsense for ages but this was simply too much to cope with.
To make matters worse we’re all supposed to be super impressed because the songs (and by “songs” I mean “every single word uttered during the course of the entire picture”) are performed live instead of being recorded in a studio and dubbed into the film. “GEE WOW I’M SO ENAMORED WITH YOUR ARTISTIC INTEGRITY”. Is that the reaction I’m supposed to have? I don’t know because my initial reaction was something like “Man, this sounds awful”. Instead of lip syncing pre-recorded songs, the actors sputtered out of key while choking back tears and gasping for breath. It was like listening to someone sing karaoke while being chased by a swarm of African killer bees. Coincidentally, that is the actual premise of a reality show on TruTV. Except that show likely has more depth and intelligence. I don’t care if the “let’s do it live” move was “revolutionary”. Not all revolutions are good. Just ask France.
I could go on. But I won’t. I hated Les Miserables with a violent passion. Let’s leave it at that.
And at this: my wife now has to watch four mob movies, three war movies and two History Channel documentaries with me.
That’s the exchange rate.
Sorry, honey, I don’t make the rules. But I will enforce them.
This is not only a stupid review but it’s pretty sexist, too.
You’re kidding,right? (I hope?)
I’d only say it’s sexist because as a female I have the same aversion to this as the blogger…I have a very lucky husband. We will not be going to see this.
It’s not sexist it’s wifeist.
Dude. You saw “Christmas with the Kranks” in the Theater?
My heavens. You missed the total point of the movie. Of course they sing through the entire motion picture. Have you heard of Phantom of the Opera? Evita? Are you an artistic pigme? So busy cutting it apart that you didn’t stop to listen to the beautiful message it contains? Did you thik Phantom of the Opera was about some idiot in a mask that haunts a beautiful young actress on his stage? Perhaps you should look a little deeper into the message being sent rather than HOW it is being portrayed. Maybe you should stick to Adam Sandler movies. Cheap, vulgar, entertainment.
I love that you consider Phantom of the Opera and Evita high art. Phantom of the Opera is for people who don’t have the patience to sit through a real opera. And Evita? Please. If you’re going to talk about musical theatre at least pick some well crafted shows as a reference! The writer mentions having seen West Side Story, Fiddler on the Roof and The Sound of Music. Now those are GREAT musical plays. Both on the stage and the screen. I haven’t seen the movie of Les Miserables, but I did see the stage production and I felt many of the things this writer felt about the movie so I think I’ll skip it. Sure it’s a great story of redemption. But read the book! Not this sappy pop opera musicalization of the cliff notes to Les Mis.
I love opera. I hate Phantom of the Opera and Evita AND Les Mis. Yes, I think it’s about some idiot in a mask (and a really scary chandelier!). I think he got the message, he just didn’t like it. Isn’t it possible that someone has different taste from you and is not “an artistic pigme”? Why such a vitriolic response to someone’s rather amusing opinion?
Do you not have a sense of humor? And yeah, the Phantom was a total creep.
OMG. Lighten up and put a smile on your face. It makes for a better day
“Death before Dishonor” Well then do something about more males being executed as terrorists, more males in prisons, more males in insane asylums, more males, in AA, NA, more males in all criminal-drunk driving, rape, more homeless males, more male failures in every population to be had over the females.
You are bitching about a movie? Sir, priorities.
Not to mention those slave galleys.
There are also more male Governors, Senators, Representatives, CEOs, chefs, architects, scientists, professors, engineers, writers, pilots, soldiers, etc. than women. Women, by and large, are not responsible for the vast majority of social pathologies but they are also not responsible for the vast majority of social advancements either. Get off your misandrist soapbox.
And you’re coming to a film review to bitch about social justice? Sir, proportion.
Maybe the reason more males are a part of all those things is because their wives pushed them into it.
Why do men die before women? Because they want to.
Annie, now that’s funny…
It is true there is a lot of singing and the plot is not terribly deep. That is not why people love this musical. The power of the music and lyrics is what moves audiences. I am sorry that you are so commercialized you cannot appreciate real art. There were some amazing performances in that movie. For the uneducated, those lyrics require hitting pitches and notes 99% of the population cannot. And, those actors sang many of those songs in one shoot. Les Miz is one of the best pieces of art to hit theaters in … well, maybe ever. Bad review, my friend. Stick to reviewing action movies.
I’m sorry Marie, but I was distracted by Crowe’s performance. He is not a singer but I know he is a great actor. I just couldn’t get beyond the average singers (not Jackman or Hathaway, the kids or the two guys), but why does Hollywood have to put in some people who are not clearly singers? I loved the show except for that. I realize it is live and the singing is raw, I get that and accept that. But what sin would be committed if they put in a great Broadway baritone who sang live for years in the same musical.
But also, why shouldn’t I get to have my opinion, you yours and this blogger his? I love all the praettle….it’s fun. I don’t hate Matt or his opinion because he doesn’t get it or love musicals like we do.
Oh and Eponine was pretty good as well.
Eponine played the role in the theater production (as did the students), and she was in the 25th anniversary show.
“For the uneducated”… “99% of the population cannot.” Please show me the support for your 99% comment. Which research study supports this claim? Also, for an uneducated, commercialized rube like myself, please explain the difference between hitting “pitches and notes”?
He acknowledged the one shoot business (if you read the whole thing). I think his point was that it didn’t improve the material nor make it more impressive.
Brilliant, simply brilliant! Great sense of humor.
LOL, Not stupid nor sexist, just knee-slapping funny. Great review.
I can tell from the detail in your rant that you watched every moment. You missed a wonderful opportunity for a long holiday nap like the rest of us husbands. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ….’Yes honey, it was wonderful and Crowe, Jackman and Hathaway were fantastic! Let’s grab a burger .’
Years ago (Many years ago) I too was kidnapped (by my NOW wife), flown to San francisco, Tied to a chair, and forced to watch this thing Live at the total cost of a New Jetpack.
My wife just sent me this review, and made me SWEAR I didn’t write it.
I could have. I should have….. I wish I had.
100% Spot on, except you didn’t emphasize enough that she was alone; all alone, so so very alone (and cold if I remember orrectly)
Unless you somehow KNOW that this is something you want to experiance, please please please believe this review.
We should use Le mizeable to get information from POW’s, except the Genea Convention prhibits it specifically (Page 356, article 27.2.9 : Cruel and Unneeded singing about being alone (and cold))
Spot on Dude!!.
Years ago (Many years ago) I too was kidnapped (by my NOW wife), flown to San Francisco, Tied to a chair, and forced to watch this thing LIVE, at the total cost of a New Jetpack.
My wife just sent me this review, and made me SWEAR I didn’t write it.
I could have. I should have….. I wish I had.
100% Spot on, except you didn’t emphasize enough that she was alone; all alone, so so very alone (and cold if I remember correctly)
Unless you somehow KNOW that this is something you want to experience, please please please believe this review.
We should use Le miserable to get information from POW’s, except the Geneva Convention prohibits it specifically (Page 356, article 27.2.9 : Cruel and Unneeded singing about being alone (and cold))
Spot on Dude!!.
Worse than the Hobbit and the Dark Knight and Star Trek? Wow.
I thought your review was hilarious and spot on. There is a reason it’s called Les Mis of course. A musical onomatopoeia.
I just laughed until I peed myself!!! Maybe I should put it into song.
I believe you have rendered a valuable service to “mankind”: not “womankind” or “gaykind” but mankind. I was feeling vaguely guilty about not seeing this. Don’t ask me why. We’re all susceptible to hype whether we acknowledge it or not, but your brave diatribe has reinforced my initial dismissal of “Let’s make guys Miserable.” If I must see this it will have to be on someone else’s dime. Thankfully I am happily married to a woman that hates musical tripe even more intensely than I do so I will be spared the dragooning you suffered.
I agree that the love-at-first-sight plot was very weak and I wish they could have set up their love for each other a bit more realistically.
But it was still an AMAZING movie. If you hate it, you have no soul.
Husband and I just watched the 1933 film version with a minimal about of singing involved. We both enjoyed the film, all 4.5-hours of it. Not a musical, lovely and laughingly flamboyant French actors, and only an occasional and appropriately placed bit of song. I can’t IMAGINE why anyone thought a musical version of this would be a good idea. LOVE your review!
Someone probably thought it was a good idea for a musical because the musical stage play from which this movie is adapted ran to packed houses on Broadway and in London for decades. Some may not like it, but clearly more do.
“The London production, as of late 2012, has run continuously since October 1985: the second longest-running musical in the world after The Fantasticks, The Broadway production opened 12 March 1987 and ran until 18 May 2003, closing after 6,680 performances. It is the fourth longest-running Broadway show in history. The show was nominated for 12 Tony Awards and won eight, including Best Musical and Best Original Score.
The show placed first in a BBC Radio 2 listener poll of Britain’s “Number One Essential Musicals” in 2005, receiving more than forty percent of the votes. A film version directed by Tom Hooper was released at the end of 2012.”
Yes! Yes! Yes! You are 100% right! (The “singing” throughout, recitative, has been used in opera for centuries. Yet somehow way more annoying here…) It was horrendous. And as a musician and music lover, I think it is sad that anyone is impressed or moved by such mediocrity. As for the music direction…cho. king. phra. ses. do. not. mean. e. mo. tion. It’s called a line, people. Sing one! Oh – that’s right. you can’t. you are too busy honking through your nose, forcing a weird vibrato or crying. And the whole show stays at one suffocating dynamic level. No subtlety or shading. Although, Sasha Baron Cohen is always awesome. Glad I’m not ALONE (sniff sniff…and cold. with. out. my. hair….) in thinking this. (NONE of my friends agree with me. And by the way, I’m a mom with three little kids. I cry at chick flicks as much as the next girl.) This was torture!
OMG you are funny. I was a bit disappointed in the singing, not quite as much as you were. I had some friends who thought Crowe was fabulous…are you kidding me? No phrasing, no dynamic change, no finishing the phrase with some texture or emotion. I was so distracted by him, but I’ve seen the live stage musical about 15 times. My expectations were very high. Love Crowe in all those macho roles he’s had, but this was a bad fit for me. Jackman, Hathaway, Eponene, the kids and the two guys were ok. Adam Lambert was crucified for giving his opinion. I don’t know why, but hopefully I won’t be for giving mine….great acting but mediocre singing.
Every trained singer I know is panning the vocals, so I do not plan to see it. I am convinced all I will do is critique the poor vocal technique. The cast of the stage productions sing live every performance and handle it, so why are we giving a “pass” to the cast for their live, “raw” (aka poor) singing quality? why the casting directors chose to hire “Hollywood types” instead of people with the proper skills is beyond me. I guess they knew Hugh Jackman and Russell Crowe would sell tickets.
I agree with you Kerry. I’ve been complaining about Hollywood for years putting non-singers in musicals to sell tickets. This is just my opinion, but starting way back (e.g., Natalie Wood in West Side Story, Hepburn in My Fair Lady, now Tom Cruise in Rock of Ages, Pierce Brosnan in Mama Mia) I have complained about this. I’ve seen Les Mis so many times and I have expectations of hearing a great baritone in the part of Javert (Crowe). I was mortified by his performance and did take some heat for that. Look at Adam Lambert….people don’t like him or are afraid of him or whatever and crucified him just for his opinions. He could have been sweeter….why? I totally agreed with him (although I did like Jackman and a few others). It’s just an opinion. Crowe ruined this show for me because of my expectations.
Encore! (To this review, that is!!!)
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It is a show not a play !!!! Let’s get our terms right …..before we judge……..5678
Isn’t it a film?
Superb. I was once forced to see the musical and all I could think about was setting fire to the place with everyone trapped inside.
Nice review – and I say that as a DUDE who actually sort of liked the movie.
You really ought to read the book, though. Musicals are crap. The ah hoc love story seems much less ad hoc when it comes 2/3 of the way through a 1200-page novel. It’s also a lot deeper and more interesting than the eye-contact-from-across-the-street portrayal.
Theater captive Walsh (Welsh) now khows how his peasant forebears felt upon being reduced to forcible servitude in Kilkenny County, Ireland. Apparently descendants of the storied Irish lesbian pirate queens are still calling the shots in his household even today. Lacking the manhood to resist their imperious dictates this docile dolt connives in his own humiliating obeisances while submitting to this enforced attendance. Those early Welsh (Walsh) captives were noteworthy for their unseemly nonstop menial whining as well. Matt Walsh is a sorry representative of a sorry breed.
It’s called love, you dolt. Men sit through all kinds of dreck for their wives and kids to show their devotion to the family. Women do likewise. Any married person who has endured tedious hours spent at relatives’ houses during the holidays, shaking off shrieking nieces and nephews and trite conversations about food restrictions or surgeries will understand.
I actually loved the movie. But, not nearly enough as I loved your review! Ha larious!
I meant to say not nearly AS MUCH as I loved your review!
I am so glad to completely disagree with this “review”. There are certain people you don’t want to agree with and this is one. Not only unwilling to engage, but completely missing the point. The film is supposed to be overly dramatic, pompous, in-you-face life-lessons. Maybe compare this to something you can relate to – you are supposed to buy into the drama like you buy into 50 people with machine guns unable to shot Arnold or Sylvestor from 100 feet away. Not to mention the “review” is poorly written and infused with teenage (maybe pre-teen) attempts at humor. Sounds just like my 11 year old. On a couple of historic notes, at that time you were more likely to hide out successfully in a city than moving around. There wasn’t free travel or entry to cities and towns. Strangers were noticed and reported. The monarchy controlled people by controlling movement. And to end, I’m quite sure France is proud of their revolutions.
Good points, but weren’t you disappointed in the singing? Some were cast very well, but I wanted better singing as a whole.
Please. It is your characterization of the review that misses the point. One may generally admire Hugo, even like the story, and still find this work poorly executed. Saying the film is “supposed to be overly dramatic, pompous, in-you(sic)-face life-lessons” is akin to saying the film is intended to be an after-school special – not exactly proving your point about the review.
I think some French may acknowledge the Reign of Terror did not quite live up to “liberté, égalité, fraternité.”
Actually, leaving town was a common way to avoid authorities and create a new life in that era. It was true both in real life and as a plot device. The Scarlett Pimpernel? John Law, creator of the Mississippi Scheme? Barry Lyndon?
You opinions are a joke. Your brain must be the size of a peanut. If you have one that is. The musical is one of the best on the world. If not the best. Runaway into a hole you pathetic individual
Bless your pea-pickin’ heart, Brad! You don’t have to agree with a review to appreciate its value.
PREACH.
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Bravo! Well said!!! Very funny! I saw this play 23 years ago and frankly didn’t understand a word that was said, um sung. It was awful! I did get that it was depressing and who needs it. I will not be seeing the movie nor dragging anyone there either – male or female!
Very funny! Much better than David Denby’s rant, and I said as much when I quoted you in my own piece about the movie. Thank you, sir.
http://theautumningempire.wordpress.com/2013/01/08/les-critiques-miserables-the-tears-the-book-and-the-backlash/
I loved the film (and the play 20 years ago) and left the film thinking that maybe it worked because they were stars/actors, and not stage singers. The screen is not the stage and you can’t simply transplant (heard about the movie flop of Cleopatra with Liz Taylor after the play’s stunning theatrical success?). Absolutely no way that Crowe came even close to the dramatic baritone on stage when Javert sang “Stars.” But instead of the voice, the movie’s closeups, Crowe’s acting, and scenery still made the song work, and I think the whole movie worked because it took its own screen approach, not just a mimic of the play.
And I also found this “review” absolutely hilarious! If you don’t like schmaltz, this movie is not for you, and it was a funny recap of a guy’s two and a half hour torment!
I agree somewhat, but I really think Crowe’s acting suffered because of his live singing….just my opinion. Overall I liked the film but Crowe was a fish out of water.. I needed better vocals. Otherwise it was good. The review is hilarious, because my husband would agree with all of it. This is what makes the world an interesting place…..differences in people’s tastes.
Spot on, sir! My favorite part of the movie is when the little kid was shot. I knew then it couldn’t last too much longer.
Still it is better than Cats. I rather have a rail road spike driven through my temple than to be forced to watch that again.
Just think if Adam Lambert said what you said….he’d be hung on a tree. You are funny, since my husband would say the exact same thing. It’s just being lighthearted, since you obviously don’t like musicals. My husband told me to tell you and Matt that you haven’t seen true awfulness until you’ve seen “Pirates of Penzance.” He was mortified. Be grateful!
Pirates at least has campy humor!
Hilarious review, but it didn’t go far enough in emphasizing the sheer awfulness of this movie. In fairness, no one could. The experience is a horrifying assault on your sensibilities. I think you’d need to capture the agony of a tortured soul in hell to get it right. Or maybe all the tortured souls in hell. During it, you squirm and writhe in agony. Once it is over, you wish there were some way to make sure that it’s over for good, stomped on, totally obliterated, never to rise again.
You really can’t appreciate the sotry if you don’t see this in the original Klingon.
I feel really sorry for this “reviewer”. I bet he could even improve upon the writing of Victor Hugo. He seems to have a perverted sense of humor and probably cannot even sing well in the shower. I could forgive him if his review were at least funny but it is boring and dumb.
Better to leave reviewing up to someone with at least some trace of artistry in his being.
I love this post. I love everything about this post. I love how it was written, I love the viewpoint it espouses, I love the angry female comments to it, I love how it represents the feelings of men the world over. I love it.
I don’t think your review was sexist or wrong. I saw the Liam Neeson Version (And I LOVE him). It was okay. But I have no need to ever see another version or to read the book. I am an English professor, so this is not about educational background –I actually totally agree with Matt. And honestly, I loved the review and may have to pass it along.
I was thinking about seeing this but when I watched the 90s version of it, I think I fell asleep…too sad. Your blog was entertaining though!
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My husband and I went to the stage version in the West End when we were first dating. We didn’t know each other all that well yet. At intermission time, I kind of looked sideways at him and he kind of looked sideways at me and we both kind of mumbled, “this is…really…crap, isn’t it?”
And they both lived happily ever after. The end.
My husband and I saw the stage version in the West End when we were first dating. We didn’t know each other that well. At intermission, I kind of looked sideways at him and he kind of looked sideways at me and we both kind of muttered, “this is…complete…crap, isn’t it?”
And they both lived happily ever after. The end.
Aiiii…double post. Because…lost password kerfuffle. I’m pleased I could retype the whole thing three minutes later and get so close to the original, though. Go me!
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But the real question everyone is asking, how does it compare to Mama Mia?
Everyone has their own opinion on the film, and mine, as far as the singing goes, is that recording it on set while the actors are going through all the emotions made it much more real and gritty in a way. It wasn’t glamorized by hollywood putting in the perfect studio recording. Of course we can all go on and on about how much we hated it or loved it…heck, we could all write our own blog post on it too, lets just try and remember to be civilized.
Bravo!! You expressed all my doubts about this over-blown production. I guess I wear the pants in the family because I have ZERO interest in this “tornado of crap” but my boyfriend can’t wait to go. With his mom, I hope.
I don’t know what I am laughing harder at, the writer’s obviously intentionally humorous review or the absurdly serious vitriolic responses to it. Matt’s review was well written, laugh out loud funny and right on the mark in a number of instances. Come on people. Lighten up and get a sense of humor.
Back when it was on Broadway a friend of mine called it “The most expensive nap I’ve ever taken.” That pretty much set the tone for me.
First I have to say… I am a woman. I’ll admit I’m not a huge fan of musicals, but I went into this similarly to how you did, “Hey, I can handle Sound of Music, so this should be fine.”
WRONG.
I had to leave the movie halfway through with the excuse for ‘popcorn’ as my mom sat crying in the theater. I called my husband to tell him what ‘miserables’ I was in. I ended up going back in to the theater to see people crying and singing along with the movie and wondered if I’d walked into some strange parallel universe.
At any rate, I barely survived, but there is one thing about this whole movie that brought tears to me. This blog post. Wow did it bring tears. I was laughing so hard I couldn’t even finish reading your review; my husband had to finish reading it (he hasn’t seen this version of the movie) and kept giving me sympathetic, but strange, looks, as I laughed so hard the neighbors probably thought I was having a mental breakdown.
Anyway, from the bottom of my heart … thank you for writing what really needs to be said.
A fan,
Elizabeth
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It’s an opera people! Thus the need to have every blasted word sung & be ridiculously tragic. Actually, if you saw it on stage (as I have done a good 7-8 times) you’d probably feel somewhat relieved that they actually spoke in the movie more often than in the play. “General Lamarck is dead,” are the only spoken words in the stage version. And as with most operas, its inherent tragic nature required that practically everyone must die. I too found it funny that nearly everyone sounds British despite they’re supposed to be French. They do it on stage too. Go figure. Russel Crowe obviously had a desperate need to pay his mortgage & was lucky enough to know a casting director who owed him a HUGE favor. IMHO, Inspector Javier would’ve been best played by Jeffery Rush… whether or not he can actually sing either. They also added a song that’s not part of the play, which I did not like at all & found it painfully obvious that it didn’t belong. Everyone who’s seen this show at least once knows the whole 3 hrs is the same 5-6 songs over & over only with different lyrics. I’m shocked they thought this rogue song actually blended in. Regardless of all the issues I have w/ the film I still love it. I’ve seen this show like 9 times now including the film version, so I obviously must. Anne & Hugh did a surprisingly great job. I was skeptical going in but they pulled it off. Overall I am pleased… and so is my husband because I was kind enough to NOT threaten death by firing squad if he didn’t take me. Instead, I went with the girls.
And, yes, I cried. And, yes, I cry every time. Sue me. 