3) We are currently either fighting or funding wars in at least 4 other countries. That’s not even counting our proxy war with China in Africa. Oh that’s right never mind, those troops in Uganda are just there because Obama was super inspired by that Kony 2012 video. Silly me. I thought it had something to do with the Chinese government trying to cut a deal for Uganda’s recently discovered oil reserves. I’m just a dumb conspiracy theorist who does stupid things like read news stories that don’t make the headlines on CNN.
4) I’m told in most nations the first responsibility of the military is national defense. As in actually defending their OWN nation. You know, SELF defense. Woefully old fashioned, I know, but maybe worth a try?
5) We shouldn’t get involved in Israel for the same reason they didn’t do much to help us in Afghanistan: it would only make the situation much, much worse.
You see, God did us the huge favor of putting us geographically about as far from the Middle East as you can get before you start heading back there again. In other words, some people live on the side of the volcano. We don’t. Maybe we ought to capitalize on that advantage a bit more and find somewhere else to go camping.
I know all the arguments. I’ve heard them a million times. “We have to be engaged over there so the trouble doesn’t come here”. Well what do you call 9-11, embassy bombings, ambassador assassinations and not to mention thousands of troops dying? I’d call it a lot more than “trouble”. So I guess the real argument is “we have to cause the thing we’re trying to prevent in order to prevent it.” I’m sorry, I find the logic a tad flawed.
And if real trouble ever does come to our shores I think we’ll all have a huge head-slap moment when we realize most of our military manpower, many of our assets and trillions of dollars of our money are spread out all over the damn globe. What do we do then? Put our rings together like the Planeteers and summon Captain Planet to save us? That wouldn’t even work. He’d just come and lecture us about pollution than fly back to the future or outerspace or wherever he’s from. Trust me, I’ve thought this out.
Now we COULD try the Power Rangers tactic where we all form into an unnecessarily large fighting robot and kick some serious ass. Problem is that only works if the enemy is also a giant robot, which is unlikely (although you never know what the Chinese are cooking up).